Disappointment can be overwhelming. A bad grade on a test, being rejected, a loved one contracting a grave illness, more than just disappointment, some of these circumstances can be accompanied by grief. This is not to say all situations are the same, grave illness is undeniably more serious than a D- on an exam. Nonetheless, all disappointment feels all-consuming when we’re experiencing it.
In this article, I’d like to address the idea of disappointment in the context of prayerful persistence, and how that relates to the goodness of God. Disappointment, after all, implies something that was expected or anticipated, and that expectation or anticipation was not fulfilled. We must, of course, turn our eyes to the Person who is able to fulfill that anticipation (or deny that expectation); and, beyond that, ask what role we play in this whole situation. If God’s will is always done regardless (James 4:15), why should we persist in prayer?
Let’s first examine what Jesus has to say about perseverance in prayer. In Luke 18:1-8, he tells the story of the persistent widow and “a judge who neither feared God nor cared what people thought” (v. 2). Over and over the widow pleaded with the judge for justice in her case, until, finally, the judge relents due to her persistence (v. 5). Jesus then says that God, being infinitely more just than an unjust judge, will “bring about justice for his chosen ones, who cry out to him day and night…I tell you, he will see that they get justice, and quickly” (vv. 7-8).
Jesus delves into this idea even further in his previous teaching on prayer in Luke 11:1-13. After giving us the Lord’s prayer (vv. 1-4), he gives an example of persistence in daily life: if you go to a friend in the middle of the night to ask for food, even if your friend may be reluctant at first and “will not get up and give you the bread because of friendship, yet because of your shameless audacity he will surely get up and give you as much as you need” (v. 8). Shameless audacity, that is, unabashed or persistent boldness. The Lord goes on to say, “Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened…If you then, though you are evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father in heaven give the Holy Spirit to those who ask him!” (vv. 9-10, 13)
Now, let’s be clear about what Jesus is saying here. He is not preaching a prosperity gospel of, “Whatever whims or wants you happen to have, you’re going to get it!” Rather, he is saying that he will give you, not just what you want, but what you need. It’s not a mistake here, either, that Christ is emphasizing our sinfulness contrasted with God’s perfect goodness (v. 13). His will takes precedence, not ours.
To be clear, this isn’t to say it’s sinful to pray for good performance in work and school, clarity in a relationship, or the health of a loved one. Rather, the Lord knows the plans He has for us (Jer. 29:11), and difficult circumstances will always work out the way he intends. In his generosity, he intends good things for us, even if it’s not the specific good we have in mind.
Persistence in prayer, as Jesus taught, is crucial, not because of our own efforts, but because God works through that persistence and through prayer. In the same way that good works are not from ourselves but prepared in advance by God (Eph. 2:8-10) and used for his purposes, so too our prayerful persistence is the Spirit acting through us to accomplish God’s purposes.
I’ve been personally struggling with a “no” from God for several months now. In situations like this, it’s easy to feel powerless, to have done everything you can, and know it’s still not going to fix things.
We may not be able to choose our circumstances, but we can choose how we react (Phil. 4:11-13). We can choose to harbor resentment towards ourselves or others, to lash out in frustration, or to withdraw from our brothers and sisters in Christ. Or we can choose to respond with faith and love, reliance on our brothers and sisters, and trust in Christ. A critical part of this is praying to God to generously give you the Spirit to have this response.
Yes, disappointment can be, and is, overwhelming. Our God, however, is infinitely more merciful than our circumstances. He knows exactly where we have come from and where we need to go.
Trusting the Goodness of God, With You,
Madison York