The Most Precious Gift
The preciousness of a gift determines how carefully we handle it. For example, as you dig through your stocking on Christmas morning, you may find candy and little knick-knacks and an apple or an orange. But you won’t pay much attention to these gifts because they aren’t that precious to you. You may even forget about them and purposefully leave them at grandma’s house because you don’t really want them. Growing up, I’d dig to the bottom until I found the treasure of a silver dollar. Getting a silver dollar each year in our stocking was one of the best parts of Christmas at grandma’s house. I still have them all. I held onto them tightly and made sure we didn’t leave grandma’s house without them. Why? Because it was a precious gift to me. Lots of candy and knick-knacks were left behind. The silver dollars weren’t.
The more precious something is to you, the more careful you are with it. We toss Tupperware in the sink. We don’t toss around the fine china that’s been in our family for years. Some jewelry could disappear and you ladies wouldn’t even know it. But your engagement ring or wedding band or neckless your father gave you stays on or near your person at all times. The children that God has given Suzy and I are precious gifts, so we seek to raise them carefully.
In the same way, if we’ve received a new life in Jesus Christ, we’ll be careful with the way we live it. If we’ve been given the most precious gift imaginable, Jesus Christ, then we’ll seek to live carefully in order to please him. The preciousness of the gift leads us to live with a holy carefulness in the world.
The Foundational Motivation
Let’s look back through Ephesians and see the preciousness of what God has given us (1:4-5, 7-8, 11, 13-14, 2:4-7, 13, 22, 3:6, 10). The preciousness of all that God is for us in Jesus is beyond comparison. Those who’ve tasted and seen the preciousness of the gift of God’s grace in Jesus set their faces to live in ways that are worthy of him. They gladly surrender their lives to walk in ways worthy of him.
One of the ways we do this is by being careful how we live. This is the main point of our text this morning (5:15-21, esp. vv. 15, 17). Paul opens the text with a general exhortation: “Look carefully then how you walk” (NIV: “Be very careful, then, how you live”). This command is like the heading that stands over the whole section. It’s explained by three antitheses, “not this, but this” (vv. 15b, 17, 18). Paul gives us three ways to live carefully for the glory of Jesus: walk in wisdom (vv. 15-16), understand the will of the Lord (v. 17), and be filled with the Spirit (vv. 18-21).
Walk in Wisdom
First, in verses 15-16, Paul says we should live carefully for the glory of Jesus by walking in wisdom. We should not live “as unwise but as wise.” The way we do this is by “making the best use of our time” and the reason we should do this is because “the days are evil.”
“Not As Unwise, But As Wise”
Living carefully in the world means walking in wisdom. Folly, or the lack of wisdom, is found in those living carelessly in the world. What is wisdom? Proverbs tells us plainly, “The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom” (9:10a). True wisdom begins when we rightly perceive who the Lord is. “The knowledge of the Holy One is insight” (v. 10b).
Living carefully with wisdom starts by understanding who God is. Who is God? The Bible says that he is the holy Creator of all things. He’s the righteous and just Judge of all people. He’s perfect in every way, full of justice and mercy and wrath and love. Though he created us in his image, we rebelled against his good rule and went our own way. Our rebellion deserves his judgment, but in mercy he sent his Son Jesus to die on the cross for our rebellious ways, to take the punishment that we deserve, and to reveal God’s love for people who’ve rejected him. Jesus was then raised from the dead in order to prove that his sacrifice was accepted by God and able to save anyone who looks to him in faith and repents of their sins. Do you know God?
Wisdom starts by knowing God. Maybe you think you’re wise because you’ve lived a long life and learned a lot through the years. Maybe you think that you’re wise because you have a track record of not doing overtly stupid things. But true wisdom only lives with those who righty perceive who God is and who they are in light of God.
Those who fear the Lord are called to walk in wisdom, to live in ways that reflect the wisdom of the God they’ve trusted. Their lives are governed by God’s word and not the world’s opinions. Their decisions are driven by a desire to glorify Jesus, not themselves.
How do we grow in wisdom? There are three things you can do immediately to grow in wisdom: ask God for it, read the book of Proverbs, and meet regularly with a mature Christian who’s older than you. James 1:5, “If any of you lacks wisdom, let him ask God, who gives generously without reproach, and it will be given him.” Proverbs 1:1-3, “The proverbs of Solomon son of David, king of Israel: for attaining wisdom and discipline; for understanding words of insight; for acquiring a disciplined and prudent life, doing what is right and just and fair” (NIV). Proverbs 4:1-2, “Hear, O sons, a father’s instruction, and be attentive, that you may gain insight, for I give you good precepts; do not forsake my teaching.” 1 Kings 12 tells us that Solomon’s son Rehoboam didn’t follow the counsel of his dad. He followed the counsel of his younger buddies instead of the older men who’d advised his father, and the kingdom was split in two. Think of one person right now you could pursue in this kind of relationship.
“Making the Best Use of the Time”
Paul says next that one way we walk in wisdom is by “making the best use of the time” (v. 16a). There is so much I want to say on this point. Ever since I taught a course on time management and productivity at Criswell College, I’ve considered doing an entire series on this topic.
Time is a precious gift and it should be handled carefully. In his book Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life, Don Whitney gives us several biblical reasons why we should use our time wisely: time is short, time is passing, our remaining time is uncertain, time lost cannot be regained, we’re accountable to God for our time, and time has value in eternity. The time is coming when we won’t have any more time. He says, “Hell…will howl forever with agonizing laments over time so foolishly squandered.” The time to seek the Lord is now. The opportunity to receive his mercy is now. Why are you so confident that you can give your life to Christ later? Your life may end today. Many people younger than you will die today. God is giving you time right now to repent of your sins and trust in Jesus.
We struggle each day to steward our time, to use it in the “best” ways. Kevin DeYoung says, “We wake up most days not trying to serve, just trying to survive.” He lists several diagnostic questions to help us discern if we’re too busy: “Do you check work emails and phone messages at home? Do your family or friends complain about not getting enough time with you? Do you pray with your children regularly? Do you have enough time to pray? Do you eat together as a family or household at least once a day?”
As the story of Mary and Martha in Luke 10 shows us, the “one thing” that we must do is sit at the feet of Jesus. Jesus says that this is “the good portion” and “will not be taken away from us” (v. 42). If someone watched a video of your life last year, what would they say is the “good portion” of it? The solution here isn’t more willpower. We must believe that Jesus is more precious than anything else on our schedules. As DeYoung says, “We won’t rearrange our priorities unless we really believe that this is the best one.” For more help on this topic, see Matt Perman’s excellent book What’s Best Next?
“Because the Days are Evil”
The reason Paul gives at the end of verse 16 for why we should manage our time well is “because the days are evil.” The powers of evil have a firm grip on the world. This leads to a careless use of time (2:1-3). Don Whitney says, “Our days are days of active evil. Great thieves of time serve as minions of the world, the flesh, and the Devil. They may range in form from high-tech, socially acceptable preoccupations to simple, idle talk or ungoverned thoughts. But the natural course of our minds, our bodies, our world, and our days leads us to evil, not towards Christlikeness.” In other words, if we sit passively by playing video games and bingeing on Netflix, we aren’t going to grow closer to God. We must “make the best use of our time” in order to grow in intimacy with Christ. This will sound boring until Christ becomes the most precious thing you have. Because of our bent toward evil, we should manage our time well in order to walk in wisdom and live carefully in the world.
Understand the Will of the Lord
The second way we’re to live carefully for the glory of Jesus is to understand the will of the Lord (v. 17). This doesn’t mean that we should look for God’s secret counsel, or what theologians call his “hidden will.” It means that we use the means that he has provided in order to know what God wants from us. I’ve already mentioned these: prayer, bible reading, and relationships with other Christians in a local church. These are the normal ways that God intends to direct his people. We often overcomplicate things by expecting God to tell us or show us exactly what to do. This is expecting God to do something he never promises to do. He promises to guide our steps, not tell us exactly what our steps will be (Pro. 3:5-6).
God’s revealed will for our lives is laid out for us clearly in the Scriptures. Those who devote themselves to reading and studying the Bible will therefore have a much better understanding of what God wants from them. For example, God most likely isn’t going to tell you to marry this person or that person. But he has told you clearly in the Bible that “charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised” (Pro. 31:30). He has told you that a husband should be a man willing to lead his wife and family spiritually (Eph. 5:25-33). He most likely won’t tell you exactly which job to take. But he does tell men that they’re responsible to provide for their families (1 Tim. 5:8). He likely won’t tell you exactly which church to join, but he does tell you to “let his word dwell in you richly” (Col. 3:16), “love one another” (1 Jn. 3:11), and to “obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls” (Heb. 13:17). So we should seek to join a church that’s committed to the faithful preaching of the word of God, that encourages us to walk in loving relationships with other believers, and is led by men that you trust to shepherd your soul. God hasn’t left us in the dark. A lot of our stress regarding big decisions would go away if we knew our bibles well, prayed for wisdom regularly, and sought godly counsel from godly people.
Be Filled with the Spirit
The third way that we live carefully for the glory of Jesus is to be filled with the Holy Spirit (vv. 18-21). Followers of Jesus don’t get drunk with alcohol and do get filled with the Spirit. The Bible never condemns the drinking of alcohol, but it clearly forbids drunkenness.
Despite alcohol being a stumbling block for many people, it has become socially acceptable for many Christians in our culture. Following Paul’s teaching in Romans 14, we must never do anything that causes another believer to stumble or hinder our witness for Jesus. The consumption of alcohol, in most cases, is a question of wisdom. Is it wise to go out drinking with my Christian friends? Is it wise to consistently turn to alcohol at the end of a long day to take the edge off? Is it wise to drink alcohol at a restaurant while I’m trying to share Christ with my waiter or waitress? How does this passage apply to your consumption of alcohol: “Be very careful how you live, not as unwise but as wise.” Drinking alcohol isn’t sinful, but in many cases it may not be wise.
The positive command in verse 18 is, “be filled with the Spirit.” This doesn’t imply what many of our charismatic friends might think. It refers to walking in and experiencing the fullness of Christ and his love (3:19). The next three verses spell out what being “filled with the Spirit” looks like. It should happen in corporate worship through singing, in thanksgiving, and loving submission in ways that are appropriate.
Speak to One Another in Songs
Verse 19 says that we should speak to one another and speak to God through songs. The church is commanded to build one another up and praise God through singing. The first part of the verse tells us to speak to one another through song, “address one another.” This is why we call it “congregational singing.” The congregation’s voice should be the lead instrument in our musical worship. This is why we leave the lights up and don’t have a rock band that would drown out our voices. Our singing is one way we encourage one another and singing to one another is proof that we’re “filled with the Spirit.” This is one reason why we leave church feeling so good about life. We’ve spent over an hour encouraging one another with gospel truth and being filled with the Spirit – no wonder we feel good, and no wonder we struggle spiritually when we stop attending corporate worship.
Our singing is for each other and for the Lord (v. 19b). Praising God through song happens when we’re reminded of God’s glory and God’s gospel, not just when people have an emotional experience in worship. This is why the words we sing are the most important part of our singing. This is why I choose songs for our congregation to sing that are full of biblical truth and full of the gospel. The best hymns and the best modern praise songs are the ones that point us away from ourselves and to the glory of God and what he’s done in Christ. When we sing to the Lord “with our heart” we reveal that we’re filled with the Spirit.
Give Thanks to God for Everything
Verse 20 says that giving thanks to God for everything is another evidence that we’re filled with the Spirit. It says we’re to thank God in the name of Jesus “always and for everything.” We’re not generically thankful. We’re thankful to God in the name of Jesus. We’re to “always” be thankful. We should thank God on the good days, bad days, normal days, terrible days, and even the darkest of days. If we only thank God on the good days, then we show ourselves to be idolaters who only use God to get the things we want. Thanking God on bad and terrible and dark days reveals a genuine trust in his goodness, even though it’s not readily apparent.
We’re also to thank God “for everything.” Again, this includes the good, the bad, and the ugly. We thank God for our kids, our families, our homes, our health, our finances, our friends, and more. But do we thank him for our sicknesses, our trials, our suffering, or our painful circumstances? If not, it might be because we don’t think that God has good plans and intentions for us through our pain and suffering. It might be because we’re bitter with God for not giving us the easy life we want. In the Old Testament, Job asks, “Shall we receive good from God, and shall we not receive evil?” (2:10) In the New Testament, Paul commands, “Give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thess. 5:18).
Giving thanks to God in Jesus’ name always and for everything is another evidence that we’re filled with the Spirit. This is one reason why we’ve added a “prayer of thanksgiving” to our corporate worship gathering. May God make us into a truly grateful people.
Submit to One Another
Verse 21 says that “submitting to one another” is another indication that we’re filled with the Spirit. Absolute mutual submission is popular today. The total removal of any hierarchy within the church or the family or anywhere else is driven by the egalitarian philosophies that prevail in our culture today. But, in context, Paul explains what he means by “submitting to one another” in 5:22-6:9. He means that we should submit to others according to the order and authority structures established by God.
Before we study the next section on husbands and wives, we’re going to consider God’s unique design of man and woman and how their roles complement one another. So next week will be a mostly topical message on complementarianism in order to prepare us to look at what Paul says about the husband-wife relationship.
Living Carefully is a Fundamental Part of Our Christian Lives
The preciousness of Christ leads us to want to live in ways that are worthy of him, to live carefully in the world. This is so fundamental to our lives as Christians that it’s in our Church Covenant: “We covenant to live carefully in the world, denying ungodliness and worldly lusts, and remembering that, as we have been voluntarily buried by baptism and raised again from the symbolic grave, so there is on us a special obligation now to lead a new and holy life.”
May God help us to see and savor the preciousness of Jesus so that we might live carefully in the world by walking in wisdom, understanding the will of the Lord, and being filled with the Spirit.